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Adventure would be an understatement
I thought that I might return home around midnight with mediocre tales of the antics of a drunken Columbian. Instead I had what might be the craziest night of partying I’ve ever had. Certainly the most unusual.
Columbian calls me at about 9, and asks where in Lexington I go when I party up there. I reply that when I “party,” I go to a friend’s house or The Paddy Wagon, a pub in Richmond. She confirmed that I’d never partied in Lexington, and then since I was still feeling adventurous, I said, “You’re the expert here. For the rest of the night you’re in charge, and I’m just the chauffeur. Just tell me where to go and that’s where we’ll go.” I would not have guessed where we’d end up.
The first place she took me was a gay bar. She said we were going there as a joke, but then I reminded her that she was in charge, so I think she was trying to call my bluff. I didn’t back down, so we wound up at The Bar Complex. It was the first time I’d ever been to a gay bar, and it was actually a lot better than I thought it would be. Almost all of the guys there were gay, but there were plenty of straight girls there. Everyone was having fun too, everyone was really chill. We had some beers and I saw my first legit drag show. It was entertaining, and I admired their courage, even if I’m not into dudes myself.
After we’d been there a while, one of her friends called from another Lexington bar, Two Keys Tavern, and asked us to join her. We got to Two Keys, and this place is the reason I don’t like going out. Bros and hoes packed like sardines into a place that miserably hot and smells like alcohol. The music is uncomfortably loud, you’re always being pushed and shoved and jostled, and everybody has a popped collar or more make-up than a clown whore. Everybody was drunk, and it felt like the house party scene in every bad teen movie ever made. I was pretty happy when we left after about 40 minutes, even if it was only because my friend wanted to go back to the gay bar.
Back at the gay bar, my friend decided she wanted to dance, so we went up a flight of stairs to the dance floor. She asks me to dance with her, and I start explaining to her how uncomfortable I am dancing. Anyone who knows me knows that for some reason it makes me feel uncomfortable to the point of causing nausea. I don’t know why, but I really really don’t like to dance. She actually listened to me, and was a lot more understanding than my friends and girlfriends have been in the past. She seemed to legitimately understand my discomfort. She also did a better job of actually getting me to loosen up. She took me to a corner of the dance floor, and made me close my eyes. She grabbed my hands and started dancing, and just made me keep my eyes closed. It helped a lot. After a while I was awkwardly dancing with my eyes open. She then decided I was ready for a plunge into extreme discomfort though, and told me to wait as she disappeared. She came back with a middle-aged gay guy, and introduced me “This is my friends Chris, and he wants to dance with you.” What am I supposed to say? No, I don’t want to dance with you, she’s lying? So I just manned up, apologized that I was such a bad dancer, and danced with a gay guy for a song. I’m comfortable with my sexuality, dancing with a gay guy didn’t bother me, but it was very awkward, and more so because he kept leaning in to tell me I was handsome. Even that would’ve been okay though, except it didn’t end with the song. Another gay guy came up to us just before it ended, and said “Come with me,” and grabbed both of us and starts walking to the door. As we’re walking, all I can think is “Oh fuck. Is this that guy’s boyfriend? Is he going to try to fight me or something? I’m not gay!”
We get to the door, and he says, “Oh you are ADORABLE. I’m Michael, a friend of Steve’s,” he nods to my dance partner, “Steve likes you, so I do too. We’re about to leave, you’re coming home with us tonight, right?” Whoa. No. I apologized, explained that I had to get back to Richmond, I had to take my friend Laura home, I had class in the morning. Steve keeps trying though, “You’re very handsome, and very nice. You’re a good dancer too, even if you don’t think you are. Let me at least give you my number” I felt like such an asshole, I felt like I had lead him on, even though I’d been thrust into the situation myself. All I did was dance awkwardly for a few minutes! I didn’t see the harm in taking his number, even if I had no intention of calling, and didn’t want to hurt his feelings, so I took it. Then he asks me to call him right then so he had my number too. Shit. Didn’t think of that. I had no good excuse. I can’t say at this point, no, I’m straight, and just didn’t tell you guys before WHEN YOU ASKED ME TO GO HOME WITH YOU. I did it. So at some point in my near future I’m going to have to deal with that… I’ll probably just lie, rather than admit that I’m actually a straight guy caught in a joke at his expense.
We stayed at the gay bar until it closed at 2:30, but my friend was still not ready to go home. She says she wants to go to a strip club. She says Platinum Plus is open till 4, she wants to go there. We get to the strip club, and the place is not busy, which makes it more awkward. When it’s not busy the dancers spend more time talking to you, which makes me uncomfortable too. I always feel so sleazy in strip clubs. I know a lot of the guys that frequent those joints, ARE sleazy, so all of the girls probably think I’m sleazy. It’s not my favorite thing. I like a naked girl as much as the next guy, but I just prefer that it’s one that I know, that I’m comfortable with, that doesn’t get naked for strangers every night. That’s not to say that I dislike the strippers either, I can appreciate them for what they are, but it doesn’t do much for me. It’s like paintings or photographs of nudes. I like the female body, but it’s not the same as if it we’re a girl I’ve got a deeper appreciation of. Anyway, she started getting sleepy at the strip joint, so I took her home, and got home myself at around 4.
What a crazy night. Not what I was expecting at all.
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Thursday night
…and I just received an interesting text from the Colombian gal I tutored in economics last semester inviting me out for a night on the town in Lexington. Ordinarily I’d say no, but tonight I’m feeling adventurous. Let’s see what transpires - it could be a good story later.
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Out of the mouths of babes
With school starting again JB has been back in town, and seeing her again is fantastic. We played a ton of Left 4 Dead over the break, but it’s much better sitting beside her for movies or Super Smash Brothers, and riding around town blasting classic rock. I’m still completely blown away by this girl. :)
Lately she’s been telling me stories about her youngest sister, and this kid is adorable. She’s only 3, but she’s so spunky, it’s the cutest thing. She loves Pink, and Lady Gaga, and frequently runs around the house singing both. She’s still young enough to be honest, so she says exactly what’s on her mind, even when it’s completely inappropriate. She’s a real cutey, I wish I could provide examples, but all that come to mind are personal. JB says she’s got daddy wrapped around her finger. I think if I ever have little girls I’ll be helpless too.
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I’ve recently stepped into the arenas for competition with my friends. My team consists of my friends Nathaniel and Steven, and myself. Nathaniel and Steven have been competing together in the 2v2 bracket for a long time, but when I joined we moved up to the more competitive 3v3 bracket. The arena are ranked deathmatch battles, where the last team with any players left alive wins. You can use any combination of player roles that you want, but we use a healer and two damage dealers, like most other teams. I play a restoration shaman, and am our team’s healer. My job is to keep all three of us alive, while Steven and Nathaniel try to kill the opposing players. Steven plays a feral druid, so he runs around and attacks as a vulnerable cat, but is able to transform into a bear for defense. Nathaniel plays a frost mage, so he freezes our enemies in place and does damage to them. In this battle we played a team consisting of a paladin healer, and two warrior damage dealers. We’re the ones running around with yellow flags over our heads, the enemies have green flags. Our health bars are the boxes over on the left - I’m the top blue one, Nathaniel is the middle light blue one, and Steven is the orange one. The purple and red numbers that pop up are damage that is being dome to me, and the green numbers that pop up are the healing that I’m doing.
In this battle one or both of the enemy warriors follows me around for the majority of the battle, trying to prevent me from being able to heal myself. If I were to die, Nathaniel and Steven would be unable to heal themselves, and would quickly die. Our strategy was to focus on one of their warriors, and instead of preventing their healer from healing at all, we’d just try to do so much damage that their healer would be strained, and at some point cut off their healer and finish the player we’d been focusing on. The team that loses a player first loses almost universally, because even if that player is just a damage dealer, it leaves their team out-numbered, and without enough damage doers to ever kill the other team’s healer. In the end, one of their warriors was foolish enough to run into the starting tunnel, which put him out of the line-of-sight of their healer. We managed to keep the healer out of line-of-sight of the warrior for long enough to kill the warrior, since healing spells require line-of-sight and no more than 40yds between players. We killed one warrior, then mopped up the other two. A good win!
The battles are fast-paced, intense, and require a lot of coordination, so we try to always play in the same room together. We’re steadily winning more matches than we lose, so our team rating keeps climbing, so we always play better and better players. The competition makes it a lot of fun.
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[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]
Bad Day - Chiddy Bang
I’ve been listening to (and loving) Chiddy Bang over the last few days. I feel this way about some people, and I think that’s what makes me love this song other than the fact that it’s an awesome song.
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2011 only comes once!
Possible new years plans: assisting in the babysitting of a 12 year old and a 3 year old. It should be fun - not only are the little girls adorable, but their babysitter is their incredibly hot older sister.
I’m one of those odd guys who loves babysitting, even when there’s not an older sister involved. I’m good with kids, and genuinely have fun with them. I miss playing around with my first girlfriend’s little brother. I wish I had little siblings or cousins to watch!
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All of the Lights
Buy it, borrow it, steal it, but go listen to My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy. I already liked Kanye, but this is probably this best hip-hop album ever. I could live without Nicki Minaj verses though, I hate the sound of her voice. Her only redeeming moment is that pussy-on-your-sideburn line on the Young Money album. What the hell does that mean?
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JB’s little sister. Cute!
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This is video from an early version of a game I’ve been playing lately. The game is The Polynomial: Space of the Music. The name is cheesy, but the game is fantastic.
It’s basically nothing more than a fractal generator, that incorporates into the fractals a visualizer for your music, so that you have a mathematically generated universe that pulses, flashes, and changes color with your music. To make it a game, the developers included a simplistic space shooter, with generic enemies to kill and be killed by. The game aspect isn’t that great, and is nothing more than a reason to explore your own generated universe. You should definitely be exploring it though, this game is pure eye-sex. Whenever I don’t want the intensity of a serious shooter, or the focus of WoW, I can put on my awesome headphones, and sink into my music and explosions of light. It completely pulls you out of this world. The most relaxing time-sink I’ve come across in a while.
I’ve always loved fractals, and The Polynomial is just ammunition for shooting down fractal-haters, if there is such a thing.
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